We’re getting ready to launch into a 3.5 edition Ravenloft campaign very shortly, so I found myself drudging the depths of motivation to work on what character I want to be for this thing. I didn’t get too far down the selection path… being a DM so long has made me uncomfortable with the notion of selecting a single race/class combination that I have to stick with for any length of time.

After considering at length what adventuring in the Demiplane of Dread could mean, this random question popped into my head tonight and it was just too good not to ask you all:

Do zombie vegetarians still want to eat brains?

I think chances are good that the answer is yes, however they will readily substitute it for cauliflower.

This also got me thinking about Jonathan Coulton‘s Re: Your Brains. Everyone should go buy his music right now, all the time. I would really love to get the chance to hang out with him someday, but chances of that are very remote!

Have a very zombie-riffic weekend!

The recent trend on our site for the less than serious content will continue yet again. As we’re between campaigns right now, none of us are particularly inspired to post game-related content. So, here’s my contribution to the frivolity.

It’s that time of year when Gen Con seems so close and yet still so far away! I’m very excited this year to meet our friends from the blog-o-sphere. It’ll be an entertaining year, I’m sure.

Just a reminder, pre-registration ends this weekend!

I’ve been bitten lately by more than just mosquitoes… the writing bug has been after me lately too. Unfortunately, I haven’t quite managed to get the inspiration and motivation coordinated, but I’m sure I’ll get there. Until then, I have been enjoying Capturing Fantasy.

In other abstract thoughts, I’ve taken a break from Oz books and starting reading the Chronicles of Narnia. It’s all good times.

That’s about all for me right now. Stay tuned for more insanity!

Today at lunch, one of my coworkers relayed to me one of the best worst ideas I’ve ever heard for playing D&D. Simply put, he had invented a fiendishly simple drinking game to go along with standard play. The only difference? You could reroll anything, anytime you wanted. You could take as many attacks as you wanted in a round. You could take as many actions in a row as you wanted. And anytime you wanted to do this, you had to take a shot.

As you may have guessed, this would probably lead to some short and very spectacular sessions. So we started talking a little more about it, and decided with the new release of 4e we could make some modifications.

• 1 action point = 1 shot
• Use any at-will power without ending your turn (no limit) = 1 sip from one’s beer
• Regain the use of an encounter power, instantly usable without ending your turn = 1 shot
• Regain the use of a daily power, instantly usable without ending your turn = 1 shot of something awful (like Everclear)
• Finishing any bottle of hard liquor = substitute any roll for natural 20, usable anytime (provided you can still comprehend what dice are)

Disclaimer: We here at Stupid Ranger encourage people to drink responsibly and will not be responsible for anyone following through on this insanity and losing their property/spouse/job/life. And for the love of Pelor, don’t do this Saturday night at Gen Con and miss Out Of the Box Roleplaying.

I finally took some time to get into my 4e D&D books tonight, and I decided to start where most players start for the first time: the classes/races section of the PHB. I could go on and on about the nice concise layout and how the two page race descriptions are both informative and paint a nice picture including a simple layout of abilities, but that’s not what I’m here for today.

I’m here because I saw something interesting.

There I was, reading the race description for the new Dragonborn race trying to decipher why it was that we actually needed an entire race for that sliver population of players that wants to act like a dragon. I mused for a few moments about Vanir electing to play a Pee-Wee Herman styled Dragonborn, spewing forth (pun totally intended) “ha-ha’s” with each breath weapon and creating a big blue shield he called Chair-y.

Shaking off that image, I read on to find the “Play a [race] if you want…” block they added to each race. Play a Dragonborn if you want: to look like a dragon, to be the proud heir of an ancient fallen empire, to breath a breath weapon, and favor the warlord/fighter/paladin classes.

Hmm… this feels familiar somehow… oh well, continuing on.

Scanning past the physical qualities (that’s why these books include ART) I lighted on the “Playing a Dragonborn” section. A few keywords kept jumping out at me: commitment, honor, oaths, and dedication. Then it struck me.

The Dragonborn is a D&D version of a Klingon. A Klingon with a breath weapon. They are viewed as arrogant and proud, and recognize the strength and tenacity of their friends and enemies. For a second, I thought I was going to see “secretly loves kittens” in the racial abilities.

I think the Dragonborn race is interesting. I’m wondering if it will feel a little flat once I actually get a chance to try playing one, and I’m not sure I would want to play an entire campaign flowing with the general race description that is given in the PHB. It feels like it could be that haughty contentious, somewhat mean fightery type that tends to darken the whole party with their prattle about pride and honor.

I suppose that’s exactly what I’m supposed to think of them. Time will tell if they handle better than I project they will… until then, set phasers to stun.

Many of you have seen Vanir’s announcement detailing our GenCon event, and I thought it best to tease you all a bit with some vague details!

My good buddy Vanir and I have been knocking around some conceptual ideas about how this whole thing will unfold, and I can tell you with no level of uncertainty that I am certain it will be his finest sugar-fueled hour. Adding in the (internet) star-studded guest list will only amplify the insanity.

Vanir conjectured that he wouldn’t be singing, but I might. What he says is true, because in reality I am a Level 20 30 NecroBard that can accomplish a bardic music version of Finger of Death. Hearing protection might be advisable if you’re showing up to this thing. Also, men might want to wear a cup.

With the intrepid panel of bloggers providing two deluxe red dragons, disembodied egos, and iocane powder I have no idea what’s going to happen but I do know one thing: I can keep up the funny ALL NIGHT LONG, so if this event spills out into some stench filled corner of the convention center after our hour is up, so be it.

And just like at Hickman’s Killer Breakfast, gifts and tribute won’t get you anywhere, but they will certainly cause something to happen. A briefcase of cash may get you on the panel briefly. Just sayin’.

One more thing (oh Lord, I’m turning into Jobs somehow)… there MAY be one or two other event announcements coming soon that you all should be aware of… but they will come later. Watch this space, there may be hints on how to make the most out of this event as the summer unfolds.

Trying to figure out what to do at Gen Con on the last day of the ‘con? If you’re like us, all you really do is wake up and scavenge for last-minute deals on the sales floor. Well, now we have solved our problem.

Stupidranger.com is pleased to announce our first (and hopefully annual) Gen Con event!

-= Out of the Box Roleplaying =-

See your favorite D&D bloggers fight for survival (and your amusement) in a very special game! Rules-light and fun-heavy, the unsuspecting, hapless, brave adventurers will face a threat unlike any the world has ever seen: a DM driven to madness by E.L Fudge Cookies.

If you’ve ever been to Hickman’s Killer Breakfast, you’ll appreciate just how hard we tried to completely rip off their format (which is 100% proven to be an incredibly entertaining event!). However, we won’t have anywhere near enough people or space to kill dozens of people at the DM’s whim, and we don’t have the kind of star power Tracy Hickman does. And I won’t be singing. I can’t promise Dante won’t. Especially not a song about the undead to Celine Dion’s “My Heart Will Go On”. Once he reads this, you may also be treated to Vanir being killed on stage before your very eyes!

Featured guests include:

• Dave The Game from Critical Hits
• Phil the Chatty DM from Musings of the Chatty DM
• Yax from Dungeonmastering
• Other Mystery Guests! (The ones Vanir forgot to Email before Now!)

And now, the moment you have all been waiting for: REGISTRATION INFORMATION!

** PLEASE NOTE THE NEW AND IMPROVED TWO HOUR TIME SLOT! **
** THE EVENT NOW STARTS ONE HOUR EARLIER, AT 9AM!!! **

SEM00075
Out of the Box Roleplaying with StupidRanger.com
Sunday, August 17
9:00AM - 11:00AM
Embassy Suites Consulate

There is no cost for this event, and there are Lots of seats available. Come out, meet lots of cool people, and have some fun with us!

Gentle Readers —

Please stay tuned to the site this afternoon (after 5 pm Central Time) for an exciting announcement. Vanir will be along to provide further details at that time.

Don’t worry! Everything is fine, we promise this will be a *fun* announcement!!

I was doing my normal morning RSS reading and saw that Yax over at DungeonMastering posted a fantastic (and incredibly concise) DM’s Guide to Uber-Villians. There’s a LOT of good material in a very small space in this article, and has given me a bunch of seeds to use in my future campaigns.

It strikes me that I often don’t use minons enough, or effectively. That will probably be one of the first areas that I flesh out for my next Big Bad.

For those of you looking for our own take on being bad, feel free to have a look at Vanir’s Proper Villany series. I’ve got some random notes on how I tend to handle evil characters, I will gather those up soon and perhaps add my two cents worth on the topic.

Over the weekend, to assuage my need for a movie late at night, I popped in the Phantom of the Opera DVD. As has happened in the past, I began to identify the story elements as roleplaying elements. And I realized that Phantom of the Opera movie is obviously a 3.5 D&D campaign with Andrew Lloyd Webber as DM.

Here’s the Story, D&D Style

The Phantom is a bard. He uses some mad Disguise skills to hide his horrible scars, and he obviously took the Skill Focus: Cape Flourish feat. He uses his Bardic Music to Fascinate and Suggest to Christine, that he is a angel and she should love him. She fails her Will Save and totally believes him.

Then, Raoul comes along. He’s a rival bard, who uses his Bardic Music to Fascinate and Suggest to Christine that the “angel” is not to be trusted and she should love him instead. She fails her Will Save and totally believes him instead.

There’s some crazy “who’s better than whom” battling, with music and rapiers and such. After leveling up, the Phantom rolls very, very well on his Craft: Opera roll, and Christine is cast as the lead. On opening night, the Phantom pulls out his Disguise Kit and joins her on stage after he kills the other guy, then kidnaps her via the conveniently placed trap door and whisks her away to his lair. Raoul tries to follow, but he fails his Reflex save when he triggers a trap door. He falls into a pit of water, but he makes his Swim check and manages to escape. He eventually finds the Phantom’s lair.

There’s more singing, and each of the bards tries to cancel out the other’s Bardic Music. Christine finally makes a few Will Saves and realizes that the Phantom really isn’t the catch he wanted her to believe he was. Raoul and Christine escape to live happily ever after, while the Phantom disappears into oblivion.

Then, Andrew Lloyd Webber takes down his DM screen and says, “Well, that’s that. Good job, everyone! Next time, we’re playing 4E, which means you can’t be bards, so email me your new character concepts.”

Last week, all of us here at SR were pleased to find an incredibly sweet deal on the 4th edition boxed set of books. $57, and that included shipping. I have no idea how the Internets brought us this price, but whatever deal Buy.com had with WotC saved me a whole ton of money. I just got my books on Saturday, and they are Fantastic. Reviews will be coming as soon as we have read enough to have any idea what we are talking about! Unfortunately, that’s not really what I wanted to talk about right now — it is simply the root from which a very stupid tree grew.

Dante went into one of our local gaming shops over the weekend, and during the course of a conversation with one of the employees about 4e, he mentioned that he got his 4e books already. And. in a nutshell, the conversation went something like this:

Dante: “I see you’ve got 4e books in. I love the new edition. Got my books just this week.”
Employee: “Well I bet you paid more somewhere else!”
Dante: “Actually, I got them online for $57 shipped.”
Employee: “Why the hell did you do that? Where are you going to play games if you don’t support your local gaming shop?” <begin several more minutes of vitriol and guilt>

This begs two questions. One, why the hell would we buy it online as opposed to this guy’s gaming shop? I think the answer possibly lies with the fact that we could get it for $57 instead of $102. I can understand buying local under most circumstances, to support the community and local commerce and all that. But please forgive me if I do not have enough civic pride or have enough loyalty to your store to take advantage of a price that is over half off what you’re asking. I get that Internet sales are killing brick and mortar stores. I understand why he didn’t go under the MSRP. But I also happen to have both a newborn and a thirst for Xbox games, and he’s crazy if he thinks I’m not going to take a $45 discount on the same product.

The other question, as to where we’re going to play games if we don’t support our local gaming store, made me a little angrier. Making customers feel guilty about not shopping at your store makes me want to shop at your store considerably less. You know what’s going to happen if you piss everybody off and nobody buys stuff at your shop anymore? We’re still going to buy our stuff elsewhere and we’re still going to play games wherever we want. And for the record, I have never played a game inside a game store before. I have this thing called a “kitchen table” around which we all gather. Some of my friends have a similar device.

When Dante told me his tale, I got my +3 panties in a twist, and I had written most of this article before I realized that I might not know the whole story here. I’ve never run a shop before, much less a gaming shop, and I don’t know how everything works exactly. Fortunately, my friend Tony did run one up until recently. So I asked him his thoughts. And basically, I was pleased to hear that I wasn’t completely off the tracks in my thinking (at least in his opinion). The guy’s price really wasn’t his fault, and he did think the guy was kind of a toolbox for guilting his customers. A lot of the guy’s problem, Tony thought, was that the owner of our local store hadn’t figured out it was 2008 yet and he was playing by an old set of rules. Tony knew right from the start that his store wasn’t going to be able to compete with the prices of the Internets, and thusly, he offered a lot of things that the Internet couldn’t give his customers. He hosted events, like tournaments. He held promotions. He gave people reasons to want to physically come into the store. And he supplemented that income with Internet sales.

All of us here at Stupid Ranger are firm believers that a strong gaming community benefits everyone. But I also believe that a good gaming community is founded when a lot of people discover a common interest and all work together to make it great. Not because they feel guilty about it. If you want your store to be the center around which the local gaming revolves, make your store kick ass. Give us reasonable prices, host fun events, put up leaderboards, and let people get in contact. The community doesn’t even have to be IN the store — put up a website. Offer stuff for sale online. Put up forums and spread the word to your customers. Get us involved and make it relaxing and enjoyable for us. It’s gaming, we’re supposed to have fun. Don’t make us feel like we’re going to sink the whole community and make your family starve if we don’t jump on your wagon. I have my own wagon. It is nice.

I imagine this article is probably going to piss a couple people off, but this is part of the world all of us gamers live in. I’d love to hear anyone else’s thoughts and experiences, especially any of you who own a game store. And please note that I didn’t name any names. I probably won’t be shopping at this particular place again, but I certainly don’t want them to lose business. I want to see our local gaming shops succeed just as much as the next guy.